My contribution to UT2, Gnomance , has finally gone public...only about a week late. And oy, what a week it's been. 

One of the hazards of working in retail as I do--especially during cold and flu season--is the sheer number of people (and their germs) that I'm exposed to in any given day. Though I try to take precautions--keeping hand sanitizer at the cash, sending staff home when they're sick and insisting they stay there until they're not--sometimes all it takes is one customer to come in and be all "MY SNIFFLES! LET ME SHOW YOU THEM!", and next thing you know, suddenly we've got a flu pandemic running through the staff like wildfire.

I actually managed to weather this latest attack pretty well, right up until about Monday of last week...when, perhaps-not-coincidentally, I pulled a string of late nights in row, trying to get my UT2 pitch into fighting shape. I woke up Tuesday morning with a sore throat and a twinge in my tummy, but like a typical manager, pulled a 'do as I say, don't do as I do', and went into work anyway, figuring it would pass.

Yeah, not so much. Tuesday night found me curled up on the floor of my bathroom, alternately wishing for death and...well, I'll spare you the rest. To make a long story short, I've lost about five pounds, I've stopped complaining about how small my bathroom is (as it turns out there's certain unexpected advantages to the toilet and the bathtub being so close together), and I've gained a whole new appreciation for the simple things in life...like solid food, and the ability to look at the computer for more than five minutes at a time without wanting to pass out from the sheer exhausting effort of it.

In related news, daytime television is horrible. OK, maybe that's not exactly news, really, but still...I mean, Drew Carey is hosting 'The Price Is Right' for God's sake! Horrible.

Anyway, all this 'too-much-information-ness' has just been kind of a gross lead-in to the announcement that my UT2 pitch has finally gone public, only about a week late. A fairy tale romance, thematically based on the song 'The Impossible Dream' (specifically, the cover by Carter and the Unstoppable Sex Machine), Gnomance is the story of a mouthy gnome living the quixotic ideal: tilting at windmills, bearing with unbearable sorrow, loving pure and chaste from afar.

Parts of it may look familiar, mainly because I've recycled some character designs and other elements that I'm fond of from an earlier, unsuccessful pitch , but please don't let that discourage you from checking it out--the main character and his story are all new, and I think it all works much better in this context. In fact, I think Gnomance may just be my favorite thing I've done for 3CN so far.

Participating in UT2 was kind of a mixed experience for me--part disappointment, part triumph--which I'll post more about in the coming days. Overall, though, I'm glad I did it, even if it did indirectly lead to me contracting what I was certain at one point was the black plaugue...

Please, check it out , why don't you...and let me know what you think?

Hi, my name is Mike and I'm new to the Zeros 2 Heroes online community.

I first hear about this site from an article in the January issue of Creative Screenwriting and thought I'd give comic writing a try. I graduated from the Humber College Film and Television Production Program a couple years ago and have written a few screenplays since graduating. I was actually writing a screenplay that I thought would make a great comic when I read the article about Zeros 2 Heroes and thought I'd check it out.

Earlier today I posted my first attempt at comic writing on the site. The script is called PAIN, and I'd be very gratful to get as much feedback on it as possible. I admit, I don't know a lot about comics, but I'd definately like to learn. I think I have a good idea started, and I'd really like to turn it into something great.

Thanks in advance as I'm sure this community is going to help me out a lot.

Sincerely,

Mike Jack

Finished... wow that took a lot.  Now starts the process of fine-tuning that bad boy, adding more the world area but it's a great start.  I initially thought of this issue being 2 or 3 issues into it, but I think this worked out better.  And I had a couple of more pages of dialogue with Alan at the end, but I like the idea of leaving a cliffhanger... cue the Law & Order duh, duh, duuh.

Thanks for all the comments and feedback.  Crackwalker, I thought the VideoGame comment was pretty funny.  This is a great way to get into writing and seeing the different styles that are out there in terms is really interesting.  I'll keep chipping away at Entity, but I want to get back to my other pitches for a bit.

 Everything is an evolution.  

Writing Tips #3

  Comics are a visual medium, and as such sometimes the other senses aren't really given enough attention.  God--or the Devil, depending on who you ask--is in the details, and putting in a distinctive sound, smell, taste or touch can really bring a story to vivid life. 

I'm going to turn to the Great Brit, Alan Moore, as my example.  Moore does amazing things with the comic book form, because he understands how it works.  The overlapping segues in Watchmen are often referred to when discussing Moore's craft, but he's got more than one trick up his sleeve.

Sound effects.  They're a staple of comics, from wham to zap to the ever-popular krak-a-doom! --so much so that many of them have become cliches.  But it's not the big, loud noises that stick in our memories; it's the small ones.  Thwip.  Snikt.  Bamf!  Each of those noises has become an icon in its own right, and there's no reason you can't create your own and make it just as memorable.  

Moore did this in his famous run on Swamp Thing, the series we have to thank for eventually birthing DC's Vertigo line.  Here's the SFX Moore came up with to describe the sound of a plant elemental knitting itself a new body out of raw materials:

SHWLUP

THLIKP

WOOG

fnit

fnit

POPA

DAK

SHLOT

FWIK

FNIT

vwik

VEETCH

wink

fwit

snit

schwinn

FWUP!

  Technically the lettering was all in caps, but the lower-case sounds were done in a smaller, solid black font.  The sounds were also done in different colors, which conveys the impression of different tones.  He uses exactly one exclamation point, at the very end.

Think about that the next time your character fires a gun that goes BANG.

But there's the other end of the scale, too.  The tiny, quiet sounds that can bring emphasis to an entire scene.  In Swamp Thing #46, an elderly nun is being chased by a horrific creature through a closed Tube station.  She runs up the stairs, the thing close behind her, only to find a locked gate at the very top.  The only sound in that panel is the tiny clink! her crucifix makes as it swings against the iron bars of the gate.   Chilling, symbolic, and evocative.

Touch, smell and taste are very different, of course--but remember that one of the cardinal rules of comics writing is never describe what the reader can already see.  Don't tell them it's a dark and stormy night; that's the artist's job.  Tell them what that whisky tastes like, tell them how heavy and cold that gun is in the heroes' hand. . .and I'll tell you just how bad that zombie actually smells.

And as always, keep writing. 

There was a great discussion on the DW forums oday.  I thought I'd share it with my fellow zedheads.  It involved the ole thought balloon or as I like to call it the "Bendis bubble."  What do you guys think?

I think that if you have a great artist they can create mood without the thought balloon.  I'd much rather see a beautiful page rendered inblues with a character with a sad expression then a character in a standard comic page thinking, "I'm so sad."  

That said I think anyone who limits themselves by refusing a certain tool of their medium is ridiculous.  It can be a style choice, sure, but to just refuse it without a justifiable reason is silly.  

For example I don't really use thought balloons, but abuse caption boxes like no one's business.  Maybe it's the Frank Miller fan in me. :) I really view the cap box as an extension of the thought balloon.  It's a good way of getting inside a characters mind without covering that lovely art with thought clouds.  

That being said I believe From a story-telling perspective thought balloons are not the best choice.  You want to pull the reader in and not loose them.  When a reader has to rifle through the rambling thoughts of every character on a page  it pulls you out of the story.  You're no longer concerned for the protagonist trapped in the grasp of the villan, but wondering, "Why do I have to read the villan's rambling thought-monologue?"   I think this is the biggest weakness of the thought balloon as a tool because it can lead to lazy writing.  A writer can just throw in exposition without having to reveal it in interesting ways.  This violates one of the key rules of writing, "Show me, don't tell me."  

I suspect the thought balloon was really an invention of necessity.  Early on comics were being pumped out at break neck speeds fr consumption by America's youth.  And often times featured many stories, in one book.  Maybe 8-10 pages in length.     Often this was the first, and only, appearance of the character so not only did the writer have to introduce the characters, but tell an interesting adventure with those page restrictions.  So of course they needed to take shortcuts and the thought balloon was it.  Not to mention art produced at this breakneck speed would have flaws, so the thought balloon could be used to help cover those as well.  When you get to "the man," and "the King" producing stories using the marvel-method thought balloons were used to fill cracks in the story telling.  

Now things are done differently, plotlines are worked and reworked to make sense, art is of a higher caliber, and though the schedules are still tight it's a leisurely vacation compared to what the guys of the golden age have to deal with.  I think that's why you see the thought balloon on decline.  the plots are more throughly worked and the art is of a much superior quality.  Thus they're no longer as necessary.

Of course I could be absolutely wrong.

Well, it's been a long, strange trip to be sure.  One with plenty of odd twists along the way, and it's ended up quite a ways from where I thought I was going when I set out some months ago.

Nonetheless, I've arrived in a rich land full of adventure and surprises, someplace good, someplace worth finding.  And I'd like to thank all the people whose support and feedback and encouragement and criticism helped get Black Jack here.  It's been a great ride so far, and it wouldn't have been possible if it weren't for all of you. 

Still, if there's one thing the struggle to make a living writing has taught me, it's that the reward isn't at the destination so much as it's in the journey.   And on this particular journey I've learned useful things, and I've made friends, and I've had some good times and heard some good stories.  You can't ask much more than that.

Once in a while, the journey takes you by some spot with a particularly nice view and you stop for a while.  You rest and you look out over the rich, inviting landscape before you, and you think you've finally arrived.  But before long you start to wonder what's actually out there in that distance, and you know you'll set off again. 

So all those who are happy for this particular moment, let's enjoy it and wish each other well and take our satisfaction in our achievements while we can.  Because tomorrow the journey starts again, and it's still all uphill from here. 

My name is Rosenthawl and I am new to the zeros2heroes community here! I am so excited to find this place and utilize it as a breeding ground for my stories and ideas! I look forward to reading your pitches and getting to know everyone! In the meantime, please take a look at my pitch, which I hope to update daily entitled: Vinny the Vegan Vampire.  Something I feel strongly about is paramount communication in family dynamics, and I've used the vampire metaphor to present an interesting allegory.  I suppose my time as a social worker has given me the inspiration to come up with this story, and now I'm going to share it with you!

 Looking forward to simply everything!

Rosenthawl

Greetings to all

 A few of you know me from the unofficial think up group or just from connections in general. But unfortunatly I have gone a bit silent over the past month and half. No worries. though. I have just hit a bit of a creative slump. My creativity is the equivalant of a burnt slice of toast right now due to a project I cant talk about right now.

 This is both a gift and a curse because even though I am currently working on something that could be huge, my rep and pitches on Z2H's website have been hurting. I would like to say that this site has been nothing but amazing and I will be remaining on this site for many years to come. I'm am really making an effort to get back in and get active with the community like i was for the first few months. of course we all know that a full and part time job/ girlfriend can take up a lot of your time so i'll do my best to return to the land of Z2H's

OK, I was never really gone, but I did take a much-needed week off during which I checked the site only 2 or 3 times.  I needed some time to gather my thoughts and take time for myself. 

 I'm had a lot of interesting things happen to my lately, more precisely: I got accepted to the Master of Arts program in Media Studies I applied to and I scored an important role in a zombie play that will be presented this summer! :)  So between bouncing off the walls at the news and rehearsals (+ work, + my current courseload), I didn't have much time to work on my pitches. 

 I will however rectify the situation this week.  Thank to everyone who commented on both my pitches: Polarity and Take a Walk on the Wild Side (UT2).  I will make changes/answer you questions/comments in the next few days. 

 I'm looking forward to catching up on everything, notably all those new pitches!

Last November, shortly after the Pitch Doctor went live, I posted two pitches as different from each other as possible. The first was the non-pervert suited superhero drama Blake Undying, and the second was the product of ten years of craftsmanship, the (largely overlooked) time travel thriller The Hollow Men. Eclipsed by its younger sibling, I was forced to put The Hollow Men  firmly on the back burner to keep up with the interest and supplementary materials needed for Blake. In the end, it was what the situation demanded, but it always surprised me that the community reaction didn't go the other way. Maybe it was because I hadn't painted enough of a picture of the arc of the series, maybe it was a lack of promotion on my part. Regardless of the reason, The Hollow Men foundered, and Blake Undying... well, you know.

In any case, I always swore that when time could be found between my various other endeavours, I would come back and polish up The Hollow Men. Months passed, projects were launched and completed, and yet still I hadn't gotten around to it. Then out of the blue, once voting started, something unexpected happened. Someone actually remembered it. In fact, it has been hovering between six and ten on the charts for weeks. I thought to myself, who are these people who are spending one of their five precious votes on a pitch that hadn't been updated in nearly four months? I was shocked. Perhaps I hadn't been as far off as I'd thought.

Recently, I'd asked a few people who were offering their services as reviewers to go over The Hollow Men and give me their thougths, and came back with some interesting suggestions and a few new fans.  Encouraged by their reactions, I've gone back and posted the full 22-page script, and formatted it properly so that you can see where the action breaks on a page by page basis. Over the coming weeks I'll continue to post supplimentary material about the future story arcs, the characters, and some of the twists that lie in wait for the Paragons who are adrift in time. 

So I invite you to take a second look at my oldest pitch, and weigh in with your thoughts and reactions, and what you'd like to see next. I still have a vast wealth of background material and information to post, so I'll leave it up to you to guide the flood. 

Looking forward to hearing from the group!

Click here for "THE HOLLOW MEN" by Lord Maim 

Yeah, that's how many Views Hallow's Eve has gotten...

Votes, well, not so much...

But I'd like to thank those of you that have pitched in to help:

- Mariathedreamer and I PM'd each other for quite a spell there - thanks for asking the questions that I (hopefully) answered with the World Info.

- TPrinces; one of the early readers and commenters - where are you now?

- Jessica; when I found out what that yellow background meant, I was stoked that you 'dug' my style - you have also disappeared from my life!

- Mek was the first dude that told me I needed to do more work - and he was right. And then he told me to do MORE work, and I haven't done that yet...

- Crackwalker said he was through with Vampire stories, but now he likes them again, thanks to Hallow's...

- Domestibot gave me a cool blurb along with his vote that still makes me refresh the rankings page till it shows up. He's also a Great Writer who's words make me want to compare in metaphor to Watching Gretzky step out on the ice... everytime he posts or pitches.

-Mr. Irony for his review and vote; he's a respected writer I'm glad is on my side.

-Yen for her comments (and PM) after reading Hallow's - it's cool when Zedsters comment on what IS working on your pitch. Thank-you.

- BestDestiny, MorganJ, cs3Ink, and Ryan Pears; Ivory Crow, Katrina27, Aliyadria1, and Asclepius for just straight-up reading; liking what they read; and voting for Hallow's...

- Ale, Diego, and Atomic Skull - all Artists who's opinions matter seperately and equally.

-Titan I know is tremendously busy taking over the world; Tenzil is always busy nowadays too - but he promised this weekend he'd read the 'new' stuff. Genrewriter has been solicited - he's busy too...

-Don read it this past week and he left a cool blurb with his vote - and he's published 1,000,000 words of fiction, so he's pretty cool in my (and everyone else's) books.

Did I forget anyone?

Fett. The rock in my shoe who I owe for making me ADD to the Hallow world, and telling me that writing a 22 page script is not enough, and that he needed more... Thank-you ;D

If anyone doesn't like how I recollect our relationship up there, don't hesitate to tell me how it really is.

And, again, thanks, and I hope to hockey sticks that I didn't forget anyone... I've got a !Great New Idea! for a Feature Script based on a Super-like-Hero that I should be working on...

Matt.